HEARTBROKEN

[nunuuu]

JUST READ ABOUT NEWS. OH MY FUCKING GOD. I CAN'T....I JUST CAN'T

;______________________;

I know it's pathetic to be this devastated about something fandom related but how...... HOW. I kind of knew it was coming, have felt it...but to have it really happen is just...horrible. I even feel more horrible after saying what I had to say about NEWS in my last post about them, it's like the gods listened, but NO, I DON'T WANT THIS. I was just about to post about Shige's adorable Photoshigenic where he talked about Koyama, Tego, and Massu crashing his apartment w/ Massu and Tego soiling and checking out his bedroom and opening all Shige's expensive champagne bottles (to Shige's horror) and Koyama terrorizing his refrigerator and Tego vandalizing his prized lamp with his signature, the little brat (it's like a fanfic only it's real omigod I love them so much it hurts) but then it's kind of apt for the announcement, because really, they're the ones who're sticking around. THEN IT HITS ME, THEY MIGHT'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THE BREAK UP THAT NIGHT, SIPPING BUBBLIES AND COMFORTING/ENCOURAGING THEMSELVES AND HURTING AND HOPING. FUCK.

I understand Ryo, having two groups is not really ideal. But Pi? Of course, from the start, Pi could've always had a solo career. But right now, to me, it feels like abandonment. HE'S PI. I love you Pi, but it really just fucking stings, right now, because you lied. It's inevitable blahblahblah I KNOW but I'm still so so so heartbroken. If I have to admit to something, it's to the fact that they never really gelled together as well as I would've hoped (because you know, I'm spoiled by the natural, glittering ease of Arashi's bond and to me NEWS was always a little awkward )... there was always a Pi/Ryo faction then the other four aka the rest...but they were all reasonably good friends (aside from Koyashige who are just JOINED AT THE HIP and are the bestest best friends I've ever seen) and I saw that and they had amazing songs and held amazing concerts and just....I can't bear the thought of never seeing the six of them together again, as a group, because I fell for them and have always cheered them on, always. I also can't bear the thought of never hearing their beautiful harmony in a new song (because omigod I love their songs so so so so so so much, unlike other Johnny's acts it's actually their music that I love I know that's silly but their discography just kicks ass and speaks to me and just... how will a NEWS song be a NEWS song without Pi and Ryo's voices???) How how how? What a fucking bludgeon. I know it's ridiculous but I love their songs that much. I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T AND JUST EVERYTHING, OH GOD, NEWS, WHY DO YOU ALWAYS BREAK MY HEART

I was just daydreaming about a new concert tour the other day, too, how dare you, subconscious, hurting me this way

At least they left us with the awesome that is their LIVE album, what is perfection, only now, it'll only make me so sad, so sad, that it's hard to imagine. Crying while listening to Share right now. Oh god

My best wishes for Pi and Ryo (because god knows I love them too) but god, my heart goes out to the now four member NEWS. Koyama, Shige, Tego, and Massu... DO YOUR BEST AND BELIEVE AND WORK HARD AND BE STRONG AND I LOVE YOU AND GOD, DON'T DROP OFF FROM THE FACE OF THE PLANET PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE AND BE HAPPY AND PROUD AND I KNOW THAT THE FOUR OF YOU HAVE AWESOME CHEMISTRY (HELLO, SOUKON) SO CAPITALIZE ON THAT AND JUST....DO IT AND SURVIVE, K???????

AND BEING TOTALLY BIASED, BUT SHINE, SHIGE, SHINE

OKAY BYE I'LL GO LICK MY WOUNDS RIGHT ABOUT NOW I'M SORRY IF YOU DIDN'T CARE FOR THAT UGLY EMOTIONAL RANT BUT SERIOUSLY, SOMEBODY HUG ME ARASHI DON'T YOU EVER DO THIS TO ME I WON'T SURVIVE

*

Within the different winds that passes
Why did we meet
If we can see the same stars now
We're just fine with that

To be able to meet with you, and the crying and laughing expressions
Are all my treasures, let's continue walking from now on



:'(